Independance Day

Why doesn't anyone warn you about four? I mean, there are entire books devoted to the "terrible twos" and everybody has a horror story about the time their little Junior took off all of his clothes and ran around the playground buck nekkid before finally peeing on the slide all in the short time it took for Mom to fetch a juice box out of the diaper bag. "Oh, those terrible twos!" Insert nervous laughter here....

But four....Well, like I said, nobody warns you about the ferocious fours. Nobody tells you about Independence day. Ryker turned four this past May. This is my third time around with a four year old. And I'm having a bit of deja vu.It's almost like somebody flips a switch the day a child turns four. And gradually, they become more and more adamant about their abilities to do everything (and I do mean everything!) by themselves. No help required. Even if it takes forty minutes to tie their shoes, they do not want help! In fact, should you intervene and try to assist, let's say because you have someplace to be and can't play the "let Ryker tie his shoes by himself, he is a big boy now, who cares if it makes you drastically late for the doctor's appointment" game, screaming and crying ensues, as well as a general hatred directed towards Mama.

Ditto for pouring milk into a cup. Which is what happened this morning while I was trying to tidy up the kitchen. For the record, Ryker has never poured anything into his own cup before. Ever. Unless you count water from the bathtub, but I don't count that because that water was usually destined for his brother's head and it didn't matter if it spilled everywhere. Don't get me wrong...I want my children to go up to be confident, independent people. I want them to be able to do things for themselves and not be totally reliant on their mother at the age of thirty ("Mom, I'm late for work, could you pour me a glass of milk?"). And I'm all for learning. I realize that their little minds are at their peak right now, taking everything in and digesting it and turning it into knowledge. I get it. My only issue is that there is no lead up.

Ryker just woke up this morning and decided he was going to make his own breakfast and pour his own milk. Again and again, I might add. The little snot had four glasses of milk. Probably just because he wanted to keep pouring! I seem to remember going through this with Andrew and Randall. By the time they hit four, there was no going back. They were going to conquer the world all on their own, backpack and shoes and milk included. They got over it. They learned what they were able to do and what they needed help with. And now they're relatively independent children who are not totally reliant on mom, but they also knows when to ask for some help.

Just like the terrible twos, they do grow out of the ferocious fours.I can hardly wait.