For the Love of Muffins -- Consult a Grammar Guide

 Particularly in these instances:

1. they're, there, their --  They're putting their books right there.

2. your, you're -- You're going to regret not bringing your umbrella.

3. lose, loose -- You lose games. Your clothing is loose.

4. quite, quiet -- The evening was quite quiet.

5. to, too -- You're too nice to her.

6. Incorrect use of plural and possessive forms. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, you are an offender. This drives me totally insane. When you address something to people, it is The Smiths, not The Smith's.  Possessive form of a noun indicates that the noun owns something, so if you use that apostrophe, the noun better be in possession of something.

7. Cutesy spellings --  Nite. Lite. No.

8. "The" is a word that has no abbreviation. "Da" is not a form or abbreviation of "the". Don't use it. I'm serious.

9. If you can type out gr8t, you can surely type out great. The same goes for 2 - it's just one keystroke less than to. R instead of are saves you 1.5 seconds. It also makes you look stupid. 

10. Compose texts and emails as if you're speaking out loud to someone. If you say it out loud and it's reminiscent of sounding out words when you learned to read, stop. Start again.

Take your time. Think about what you're saying. Express yourself intelligently. Make your kids do the same. When you're not sure how to write or spell something, look it up in a reference guide or on the world wide web.

You may now return to COVID-19 coverage and the corresponding Facebook status updates.

Grammatically yours,

Erin

My Baby is 16!

Dear Ryker:

How can it be possible that sixteen years have passed since the first time I held you in my arms? I remember every detail about your birth, and often replay that day in my head – wishing I could go back and relive it one more time. You were my last-born; the one who perfectly bookended your oldest brother and solidified our family.  You have created a love inside of me so fierce, so unbreakable, so unending, and so unconditional. I am incredibly lucky to have been chosen to be your mom. I really must have done something right in life to have been given a child like you.

You have grown into an amazing young man. You are that person that I always wished I could be. You are handsome, confident, smart, and well-liked by everyone. You shine in everything you do. Even though you are the "baby", your siblings look up to you, as do your friends and anyone who enters your orbit.

Please know how incredibly proud I am of you. I know I have been hard on you at times. I set high expectations that you sometimes feel are impossible to reach. Let me reassure you that you have never ever disappointed me. I set those expectations because I want you to achieve everything you have ever wanted. I want all of your greatest dreams to come true. I never want you to feel undeserving of anything, because you deserve the absolute best that life has to offer.

I want you to keep that confidence you have now, and continue to try new things; to meet new people. You never know what door will open if you just put yourself out there. You will make mistakes, but it’s okay because that’s how you learn lessons and become a better person. I’ve certainly made my share of them, and still make them today. Those mistakes created the path to the amazing life I have today.

To be honest, you have probably taught me more than I think I’ve taught you.  You choose to see the good in people, and stand up for others even when you are standing alone. I’ll probably still lecture you simply because I am your mom and that’s what we do, but following your examples, my life has become much more fulfilling.

It amazes me how people are drawn to you. I can send you to a basketball camp half way across the province, knowing nobody, and you come home with a dozen new best friends. I admire your quiet strength in the way you accept the unfair things that happen to you (no 16th birthday party, not getting to take your driver's test today, no camps this summer.....stupid COVID). You keep moving forward, never letting them drag you down.

I hope your birthday is everything you dreamed it could be. Remember how loved you are. You are forever my sweet baby, your dad’s sidekick,  and your brother’s best friend. We will all always be here for you – your biggest fans.

Your story is just beginning. I can’t wait to watch you write it.

I love you times infinity.

Mom

2019 -- My Top 10 Year In Review

Another year -- another decade!  How crazy is that?  It's hard to believe that 2020 is here.  I've decided to do a little post on a few of my Top 10s of 2019.  Feel free to share yours with me.  *Note that ALL of my lists are in no particular order*

Top 10 of my favorite songs that came out in 2019. 

10.  Me -- Taylor Swift
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LJrejf8blAA

9.  I Don't Care -- Ed Sheeran feat. Justin Bieber
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7xznoYl1ZKE

8.  Sweet But Psycho -- Ava Max
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KBFD0aoZy8

7. Sucker -- Jonas Brothers
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yG60iRJwmfA

6.  Memories -- Maroon 5
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K_iH2YSaY3U

5.  Circles -- Post Malone
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SPW22-RUM1k

4.  Only Human -- Jonas Brothers (yes twice....don't judge me)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ErZKnkp0SmE

3.  Blinding Lights -- The Weeknd
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fHI8X4OXluQ

2.  Bad Guy -- Billie Eilish
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-TbQnONe_w

1.  Someone You Loved -- Lewis Capaldi (OK....this is my number 1 favorite song of 2019)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u1yVCeXYya4

Top 10 Books I Read in 2019

Let me just say....if you are fans of crime/suspense drama type books, the Kellerman's are phenomenal authors.  Seriously, Jonathan, Jesse or Faye Kellerman -- you can't go wrong!

 10.

9.

8.

7.

6.

5.

4.

3.

2.

1.

Top 10 of my Favorite Movies released in 2019

Again these are in no particular order

10.  Three of the hottest men in Hollywood?  Yes, please.

9.  Cute, family film

8.  All Avengers movies are good Avengers movies

7.  Definitely a different take on the character, but I thought it was really well done.

6.  LOVED!!!!!

5.  OK, so this is a loooong (3.5 hours) movie, but you can't go wrong with DeNiro, Pacino and Pesci

4.  I've watched and enjoyed the entire trilogy.  I think Gerard Butler is a very underrated actor.

3.  Taron Egerton is phenomenal in this movie

2.  OK, so the movie itself was only about a 7/10, but the comic relief in the character "Pawny" was awesome.

1.  Cute movie.....and at least it wasn't Toby McGuire

Top 10 of my Favorite Pictures I took in 2019

These are completely random pictures I took throughout the year.  No rhyme or reason.

So there you have it folks. Let me know what you think, and if you've seen any great movies, read some awesome books or heard some amazing songs this year, please share.

Here's hoping 2020 is even more amazing than 2019 was!!

Five Things To Do When You Feel Like You're Not Enough

Take stock of the things you are consuming. || If you want to be a professional speaker, and the mega successful professional speakers you follow online are making you feel not good enough instead of inspired, it may be time to unfollow for a little bit. If you're trying to make it as a blogger, and the giant bloggers you follow are making you look at everything that's wrong with you instead of propelling you forward, maybe a little less of looking at their pictures and a little more finding things to consume that are encouraging to you.
There are seasons when all the bikini models on instagram couldn't make me feel bad about myself, and there are seasons when seeing a stranger on instagram with a cute haircut can send me into tears over a bad hair day. Know your seasons. Pay attention to them. 
Reevaluate who you're spending the most time with. || Let me tell you something - your circle should make you feel like more than enough. They should hype you up way too much. You should leave any time spent with them feeling like you can take on the whole world.
If I believe the things my family says, it's only a matter of time before I win a Grammy. If I believe my best friend, I'm the hottest person that ever walked the face of this earth every time I wear something cute. That's how it should be! So many things in this world are going to make you feel like you're not enough - the people you choose to do life with should not be one of them. 
Say it out loud! ||  Sometimes we have to say a doubt out loud in order to kill it. When you're feeling like you're not enough, speak the actual words out loud. Say it out loud to your friend: I feel like I'm not good enough for this. Talk it out. Make yourself talk out how you're feeling inadequate, and make yourself listen while they tell you how adequate you are. Say it out loud alone in your car: I feel like I'm not good enough for this. And then have a good laugh that you're worried over something so insignificant.
Ask yourself - Is this real? || This is something I've learned this year and is maybe the most powerful tool I've ever known about. Ask yourself: Is this real? 
Are you really not good enough? For example, lets say you're feeling not good enough at your job. Ask yourself and answer honestly: Are you not good enough for your job? 
Are you getting all your work done? Able to complete assignments without a problem? No complaints from your boss? Cool, you're good enough! Move on from that worry. Every time you come back to it, remind yourself of the reasons it's not real, and move on again.  
Are you not getting your work done on time? Really struggling with simple assignments? Your boss complaining about it? Okay, you might not be good enough for your job - YET. Get a plan to fix that! Take a class, meet with people who are good at what you're trying to become good at, and work. 
Every time the worry that you're not good enough pops up, acknowledge it, then remind yourself that you've got a plan to fix that and you're working on it. 
Do one thing that builds your confidence. || It feels good to do things we're good at. Are you good at writing? Write something. Baking? Bake your neighbors some cookies. Running? Lace on up. Do something you have confidence in to remind yourself how good enough you are. 

A Seat At Your Table

I've been thinking about this a lot lately. One of my favorite quotes is, "When you have more than you need, build a bigger table, not a higher fencer." I love that and I think it's so true. HOWEVER. In the same way I believe that, I also believe that not everyone gets a spot at your table. 
Your life is yours. Sure, you work for other people and live with other people and probably take care of other people. But at the end of the day, your life is yours, and who you share it with is entirely up to you. You're in charge of who gets to sit down at your table and eat. And while I believe in love and kindness and open arms, I also believe in protecting the preciousness that is your life. 
Growing up, when it came to bad friends, my grandma would say to me, "Do not cast your pearls before swine." Meaning, if you put expensive and beautiful jewels down in front of pigs, they're not going to appreciate them, and they're probably going to get them filthy. Same goes for your life - there are some people who aren't going to appreciate it.While I kind of understood the thought behind that then, it's something I truly understand in my adult life. Just like pigs don't deserve pearls, there are some people who just don't deserve a front row seat to your life. 
The friend that makes you feel bad about yourself? She doesn't deserve a seat at your table. 
The girl you follow online who constantly makes you feel like you are not enough? Your table is not for her. 
The toxic person in your life who hurts you? He can go now.
The coworker who you have to see at work, but is always talking down to you and making you feel less than? They are uninvited from your table. 
Guys, you don't have to do it. You don't have to share your life with everyone. You don't have to live a draining life just to please others.   
And let's be honest, that's what it does. It drains you. Having too many people at your table drains you. Trying to entertain and please and pacify people who have no business being up close and personal in your life drains you. Your life is worth so much more than that. You are worth so much more than that! 
Yes, we should be loving. Yes, we should be kind. Yes, we should be inclusive and open to others. HOWEVER. When someone shows you who they are...when they show you what their intentions are, when they show you how they plan on treating you...believe them. 
Your table? It's amazing. Those chairs at your table? VIP SEATING, BABY. Fill them wisely. 

On Being Thankful

As the year draws to a close, I've been thinking a lot about what 2018 looked like in my little corner of the world.  It was chock full of some really good things, some really bad things, and a lot of in between things, as years tend to do.

As far as my personal life goes, the best thing I started to do this year was a thankful list.  I got the idea after reading a blog post about how we can train our brains to focus on the positive things in life.

The theory behind the list, is that if you know that at the end of the day you're going to have to list 5 (or more) things that you were thankful for that day, you will eventually start LOOKING for little things to be thankful for.  So where typically you may have hit 3 green lights in a row on your morning commute and thought nothing of it, when your perspective is more one of gratitude, your brain notices those green lights and flags them as something good to add to your list at the end of the day.  I was intrigued by the concept and started to give it a go.

It is TRULY life changing.

And, the biggest reason I know it is life changing is that when I've had a bad day (or 4), I noticed that I stopped doing it.  And I could see a big difference in my perspective, and how I viewed my day.

Calling out the small things in life to be thankful for has completely shifted my thought processes.  I mean, if I'm going to let a few small bad things that happen to me ruin my day, why can't I do the same with the few, seemingly insignificant, good things that happen every day?

A small (and seemingly ridiculous, but go with me on this) example of this is tea.  If I hit the drive through for a tea, and it's cool (or at least not warm enough), I'm going to be a little annoyed.  But if I get to work, and my tea is still hot, I don't really think about it because tea is supposed to be hot.  But if I know that I need 5 little things to be thankful for, I'm going to be like, "Yes!  Hot tea!  This is awesome, and it's going on my list today!"

If you're thinking about 2019 goals/resolutions/intentions -- then this is a great one to start.  It so simple, but so impactful.  It is both doable, and completely life changing.

So grab yourself a small notebook, or open up the notes tab on your phone.  At the end of every day, write down 5 things you are thankful for.  Don't include the big things, like your family and friends -- just the little things from THAT day (like green lights or hot tea).  It can be surprisingly difficult the first few days, but that's kind of the point.  Train your brain to be happily surprised and thankful for those little things.

I promise you won't regret it.

Just Slow Down

I write some version of this post every year, and just like always, it's just as much for me as for anyone who may read it. 

Here we are, less than two weeks out from Christmas. Things tend to start to get a little hectic around this time, so I wanted to drop in with my yearly reminder for you to slow down and savor what this season is truly for and about.
'Tis the season for gifts and parties and lots of plans, yes. It's also the season for joy and gratitude and wonder. Don't lose those last three because you're so caught up in the first three. 

Joy and gratitude and wonder are all free, but you have to look for them. And, in my personal experience, it's a lot harder to find them if you're running around at light speed trying to do all the things. 

So this week, slow down for a minute or two and just savor the good things around you. Listen to your favorite Christmas music. Actually look at the Christmas lights in your neighborhood instead of just rushing to get home so you can rush to the next thing. Don't run yourself so ragged that you arrive at Christmas day exhausted and stressed over how much money you've spent. That's no way to start the new year. 
This time of year is beautiful and special for so many reasons other than what you can buy or what you have to do. So don't miss that!