Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Weigh In Wednesday

Date: Wednesday 16 October 2013


Previous Weight: 233.5 lbs

Current Weight: 235 lbs

Gain / Loss: 1.5 lbs -- Gain

Total Loss: 0

Current BMI: 38.9

Cravings: Popcorn

Notes or Feelings: Stupid Thanksgiving -- how do you expect me to turn down turkey dinner with all the fixins???

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Table Talk Tuesday

So, we didn't have a lot of questions tonight....the boys didn't feel like taking it seriously this evening.

1.  If you were ice cream, what flavor would you be?

Andrew - Neapolitan, because I'm well rounded

Max - Vanilla because I'm white

Ryker - Bubble Gum because.....um......I'm delicious


2.  What is stashed under your bed right now?

Andrew - Carpet , seriously it's clean under my bed right now.

Max - Whatever Ryker throws under there when he plays XboX in my room....probably dishes

Ryker - I don't even know.....probably a bunch of stuff.


3.  If they made a movie of your life, who would play you?

Andrew - Ryan Reynolds.....I've been told I kind of look like him

Max - Nick Cage

Ryker - Adam Lavigne



4.  When you look at your life so far, what's one think you've accomplished that you can't believe has happened.

*Now this is when things got a little too heavy for the two younger boys and we had to quit after this question.

Andrew - I have a certificate signed by the President of the United States (for doing so well in his gifted schooling program)

Max - I haven't accomplished anything (this made momma sad, and we then had a long talk about what constitutes an "accomplishment")

Ryker -  I'm awesome at soccer and voilin

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Weigh In Wednesday

So, I've decided AGAIN that's it's time to do something about my weight.  It's time to stop being complacent about my life and my health.  So I've decided to go back to my Wednesday weigh ins -- and I've decided to put them here on the blog for the world to see......and to try and keep myself accountable.  So at my last weigh in I started at 235 pounds.  :(

Here we go:

Date: Wednesday 18th September 2013
Previous Weight: 235 lbs
Current Weight: 233.5 lbs
Gain / Loss: 1.5 lbs
Total Loss:  1.5 lbs
Current BMI: 38.9
Cravings: Cheese
Notes or Feelings:  Feeling motivated to make some life changes

Monday, September 16, 2013

Back to School 2013

Well the boys have made it through the first week of the new school year.  Everything seems to be going great so far.

Ryker is now in 4th grade.  He really likes his new teacher and has quite a few friends in his class.   He's really excited to be learning new things in math and science and is reading big chapter books every night.  His current reading is the Hunger Games books and he loves them.



Max is in grade 8 this year.  His last year of Jr. High.  He grew like a weed this summer and is now the tallest kid in the house and only about 4-6 inches shorter than his dad.  He's still got his quick wit, which I think would make him a great lawyer, but he says he's going to become an engineer.


Finally my Andrew.  Grade 11!!!  How did that happen.  He's such a busy kid this year.  He's got a full plate of classes (and picking up an extra grade 12 class next semester), he's working part time, he's head of the drama club, he's in the school play, he's on student council.  It seems to me that the boy is a bit like his mother.....thriving in the chaos.  He also got his learner's license this summer!  EEP!!!


They are all at such fun ages now!  But a part of me still wishes that time would slow down.  I'm not ready to start looking at universities and thinking of how they'll manage life on their own.  If anyone has a magic potion to keep them young just a little longer......you know where to find me.

Saturday, August 24, 2013

A Trip Down Memory lane

My husband has been cleaning up his computer and going through a ton of files, some more than a decade old.  He came across a letter that I had written to the boys about 8 years ago.  So, I have decided to preserve it here on my blog.  It brought me to tears when I read it again.  I sure do love my boys.


Dear Sweet, Strong, Amazing Boys:

You are growing taller and stronger every day.  The quickness of it takes my breath away.  It sounds cliche to say it seems like only yesterday.....but it does seem that way.  Only yesterday  I was a mother of one -- then two, then three.  Sweet baby boys clothed in blue, who fit in the crook of my arm.  Quickly you grew and were running away from me.  Even at that moment I realized the significance of your first steps.  Steps that were necessary.  We may bond as you  grow older, but you will always be walking away.  My job is not only to teach you how to do so, but how to do it with pride and dignity.  

Sometimes we'll clash, but one day you'll understand the convictions I have for you.  I tell you now because I understand how important a mothers guidance is.  And I've been where you are.....and where you are going.  I know firsthand the dangers that await you in your life, and I only want to steer you away; to prevent you from pain.  While I am wise enough to understand that I cannot prevent it all, I only hope I can succeed in instilling wisdom and strength in you so you can either not experience some of the hard lessons of life, or have the inner strength to grow from them.

Even now as you are so young, I raise you with your future in mind.  My prayer for you is that you are strong enough to stand up for what you believe in, but flexible enough to learn new things. I long for you to be happy and wise; to love unconditionally, to not be scared to let go sometimes.  

Most of all, I wish for you to know who you are.  Take time to be your own best friend, so that you don't have to seek outside yourself for fulfillment.  Even now I see your gifts and talents.  I hope you can see them too.  They are so bright;  it blows my mind to realize  that such amazing creatures are my children; my sons.

I have an extra responsibility as your mother. Right now, I am a role model. I hope I do it with grace and strength. But please, accept my apologies now, for I will stumble. I will misspeak and criticize. Please realize, even if we are at war, love is still present. Always present. I have fears. I cry. I shout. I laugh. Please do not be shocked by that. I only want you to realize that it's okay to feel. Weakness isn't found in showing emotions, but hiding them. Strength is shown when you do not hide; when you allow others to see who you are.

Andrew, especially for you now, I write this. You are entering a new phase of life. You are getting older; maturing. The little boy I carried in my womb, cared for, and cried over the first time I sent you off on a school bus is becoming a young man. You sometimes seem to struggle with who you are; with realizing that you don’t have to put on different faces around people. Please don't. Can you not see what I see?  I see a boy who is wise beyond his years.   I am proud of you. I am proud of your heart and your intelligence. I am proud of your "embrace life fully personality.  Your joy is contagious and will be a gift to those around you.   You can be both analytical and crazy at the same time. Embrace it. Do not hide it or be ashamed. You are a gift to this world. I apologize if I do not show it enough.

Randall, my intense, amazing and free loving boy. You are talented and amazing in so many ways, and your exuberant spirit is a gift. You cannot leave the room without a hug, which warms my heart each and every time. I know you sometimes feel like things are too hard, but at the same time your determination to not let things get you down are what is going to take you far in this world. You are not even 6, yet your depth of love for all things in nature amazes me. Your imagination is an invaluable asset that I hope you embrace. I pray that you never lose the ability to see what others miss. I know that new things are happening in your life, and sometimes it may seem scary and impossible. Hold your head high and keep walking forward. I'll be behind you if you need to hold my hand.

Ryker, my tiny little ball of giggles, you amaze me. You are the most consistently happy 
child I know. I have never in my life seen someone so young with so much happiness. It 
warms my heart to know that your daddy and I have given you a life that is free of 
sadness. Your voice warms my heart, and your feistiness lets me believe that you will be 
strong like your brothers. You are a cuddler. I don’t know if that is because you are the 
baby and that’s what you know, or if you just have an innate ability to love without 
question. But I pray that you will always have that desire to show love to those around 
you. 

My boys......I will never pretend life is easy. It is hard. But through hard work 
comes achievement, and through achievement comes confidence. Never believe that
there are certain things you will not be able to achieve. Listen to what I'm trying to say 
when I tell you to pick yourself up and keep going. Life is never lived if you are scared to 
get up or if you stay down after your first fall.

These are the lessons I want you to learn:

And as you grow, your heart will be broken; maybe many times. Learn from each 
heartbreak.

Do not follow the crowd. Be proud of who you are and stand strong. Even if at times you 
stand alone. I promise in time, pride will come with that decision.

It's okay to say NO. No to friends who ask you to compromise who you are, no to those
people that tell you that you cannot achieve, and no to those doubts that try to keep 
you back. 

Remember to see inner beauty; not only in yourselves but in all the things and people 
around you.

Make your choices with education and conviction. Just because a lot of people are saying 
it is right, doesn't make it so. Sometimes the correct path is found when you take the time to 
explore on your own. 

Never accept put-downs or abuse. And never dish it out either. Boys don't hit girls they 
like. They don’t hit girls PERIOD. They also do not pressure, put down, criticize, or run 
away. 

God blessed me with three wonderful and amazing sons. One day, you will leave for your 
own life. Do it with your head held high and a soul full of confidence. And when you leave 
my arms, know that I raised you with love and look forward to the day when you are not 
only my boys, but also my friends. 

I love you,
Mom

Sunday, August 4, 2013

Stop the License Plate Madness!!!

Recently I traveled, by car, to Calgary -- a city roughly 3 hours drive from my home..  And while I was driving these mind numbing roads, I began to notice some very interesting personalized license plate frames.  You know the ones I'm talking about.  The ones that read: I Would Rather Be Driving a Golf Ball. Get it?  Not driving a car but a golf ball?  Genius.  Now these kind of cheesy frames don't bother me because usually it's just some retired man's attempt to spruce up his Cadillac. It's all good Grandpa - drive on. 

The ones that bother me fall under three categories:

1. The Princess License Frames

We've all seen these.  They are usually bedazzled with some rhinestones, colored in pink, and most likely placed on the car by some father or mother who was trying to passive aggressively tell their daughter how annoying they feel they've become.  While driving I saw one that read on the top: But, But, But...and on the bottom it read...I'm the Princess. And as I passed the car to give the obligatory stare of disgust, I saw a morbidly obese girl texting on her cell phone while driving with her knee.  Cinderella and Snow White eat your heart out.  Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not jealous of these self-proclaimed Princesses.  I just wish that they would respect real royalty and be honest about themselves.  Maybe instead of saying, "Beware Here's Comes The Princess" they could be truthful and say, "Beware here comes a woman in her thirties, who still lives in a fantasy world where she thinks she should be treated like the most important person in the room."  I'm sure there's a website that could handle this order.

2. The Exaggerated Declarations

I get it.  You think you are a great Grandma or Aunt or whatever, but I don't need to see it on your car.  Because really #1 Grandma?  Really?  Who voted? I didn't vote.  How do I know you don't secretly lace your home cooked cookies with Vicodin?  Do you even have grandchildren?  And lastly, I just passed your car and there's a man driving it!  Now what? Does this license frame mean anything?  How can a man be the #1 Grandma??!

3. Are You Trying To Get Pulled Over

I'm not kidding when I say I saw these two license frames: 1. Drunk Guy Coming Through  and 2. The top had three Marijuana leafs on it and on the bottom it said I'm High.  Yep, an actual statement of "I'm High."  What's the end game here?  Are you promoting drunk driving?  Do you hate MADD?  Were you actually high when you placed this on your car? 

So, people please give me a second.  I get it - it's tempting to place something on your car in order to distinguish yourself from all the other cars out there, but let's think about it first.  Sure you'll always find the car that reads: Do Not Disturb...I'm disturbed enough Already - but do you really want to be associated with the "crazy car" at work?  Well, actually you are probably just an unemployed blogger...never mind - bad example.

Sunday, July 7, 2013

An ode to my not-so-beach body

Yeah, me and bathing suits are probably going to have to break up.  At least until I lose a few pounds.

Swimsuit season is now in sight,
But seeing me in one -- oh man, what a fright.
My butt's a sedan,
Maybe I should go tan.......
Or is cottage cheese meant to be white?


Thursday, July 4, 2013

Quiet

Quiet is good.....sometime's it is necessary.  Especially after the crazy week that has just been.  Holidays, family, food, people, celebration -- in all the hubbub that is life, there can be a lot of noise.  Good noise and bad noise.

But still, noise.

Noise can be overwhelming, even to an extrovert.

Right now life is so noisy.

Too noisy.

And I just need some quiet.

Thursday, June 27, 2013

Orange you Glad it's Summer

So today was officially the last day of school.  I figured the boys deserved a little treat to greet them when they got up.  I started by making this sign


Then I went out and bought a bunch of orange treats and a couple of toys for each of the boys


I put them all together in a bright orange bags and left them on the table when I went to work this morning.  They were a big hit.

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Table talk Tuesday......on a Wednesday

OK, so I know I'm a day late.....but it's that crazy time of year when school and soccer are ending. finals are ending, plans are being made....so please forgive me for my slack-assedness this week.

Here are the questions and answers we had at our dinner discussion this week.

1.  What kind of pets do you want to own when you grow up?

     Drew -- Wolf
     Max -- I would want a dolphin with a gorilla taped to its back
     Ryker -- A gecko, a monkey and a komodo dragon

2.  If you saw someone cheating on a test would you report them?  Why or why not?

     Drew -- No because no one likes a snitch
     Max -- Yes, because cheating is bad
     Ryker -- No because there is no point; they are only cheating themselves (smart boy, eh)

3.  If you could make snow any other color for one day, what color would you choose?

     Drew -- Red so it would look like blood
     Max -- Black so people would get all freaked out about it
     Ryker -- Rainbow colors because it would look pretty

4.  If you could do one really nice thing for yourself  this week, what would it be?

     Drew -- I'd go to Marble Slab and pig out on ice cream
     Max -- I'd buy myself a dolphin and ride it
     Ryker -- I'd teach myself to swim

5.  What could we do as a family this summer to help others?

     Drew -- Volunteer at the soup kitchen
     Max -- Give food to homeless people
     Ryker -- Help clean up some lakes

6.  What is the one thing about becoming an adult that you are most excited about?

     Drew --Making my own decisions about big stuff, finding my own way, getting out  on my own  
     Max -- Not to be a jerk, but I'm looking forward to moving out and having my own space
     Ryker -- Being able to drive

7.  Would you rather have the ability to read peoples minds, or be invisible?

     Drew -- I'd rather be invisible.  Mind reading is a waste of time because people always say out loud what their thinking eventually to someone -- plus if you're invisible, you can mess with people
     Max -- Invisible because I could mess with people and get away with it
     Ryker -- Mind reading so that I could read peoples minds when I'm standing in line at Walmart
   



Monday, June 24, 2013

Soccer Season End Round Up

I was going to post this on Saturday night because I needed to get some pictures off my camera, but for some reason my computer isn't recognizing them. *sigh*.

So, you'll have to do with the ones I got.

The season started out pretty rough.....we lost every single game.



I tried not to be bummed at all the games Ryker's team lost.  After all, this was his first year ever playing soccer.  And, honestly, he didn't seem to mind not winning.  He just loved being out on the field.  He loved the game; playing, watching, cheering on his teammates.



















He was one of  the three best players on the team.....which is odd since most of us aren't sports minded in this house.  But he ran his butt off every game.  Even when he knew they would lose the game, even knowing they had no chance of catching up.  He would run up and down the field, running, passing, cheering for his friends..  I have never seen such a work ethic in a young, new athlete in my life.  He just LOVES the game.\














He's already told me he wants to take summer camps, play indoor soccer every fall and outdoor soccer every spring.  So it looks like I am literally now a "soccer mom".

                  


Friday, June 21, 2013

The Rains Came Down and the Floods Came Up

Where to begin.......

What started out as a couple days of rain


And a little bit of hail



Has turned into some of the most catastrophic flooding our province has ever seen.


Tens of thousands have been evacuated, displaced, and uprooted.  Entire towns have had to leave, not knowing what, if anything, they will come home to.


Many of these people have lived in these towns their entire lives.  The devastation is heartwrenching.  A tenth of the city of Calgary has been evacuated (thats 100,000 people).......the military has been called in to help.  


Living in a fairly safe, secure, and landlocked province, you would think this would never happen to us.  We look like we've been hit by a hurricane.  The reality is, Mother Nature is just an equal opportunity destroyer.  For hours at a time the rains seemed endless, and just when you thought you would get a reprieve, the deluge would start again.


City after city have declared states of emergency.  People are panicked, people are scared.....and through it all people have proven time and again that the human spirit is a remarkable thing.  For every story of fear and devastation, there is a story of love, compassion and people on guard and ready and willing to help their neighbors.  We pull together, we embrace people we've never met and we offer what we can to those who have lost so much..  There is A LOT of cleaning up to do once the water goes down......but people are ready.

                                       

So as you go about your life in the next few days, please take a moment a say a prayer or give a thought for Alberta.  We could really use it.



Friday, June 14, 2013

Some ABC's all about me

I know you all want to know everything about me......ha ha ha, narcissism rules!  Anyway, here's a fun little game.  Play along if you'd like.


Age:  36
Bed Size:  King
Chore you hate doing:  Cleaning toilets
Dogs:  1 female cavapoo named Penny
Essential start to your day: Fruit
Favorite Color: Red (purple a close second)
Gold or Silver: Gold
Height: 5'5"
Instruments I play:  Piano, Clarinet
Job Title:  Administrative Clerk
Kids:  Three boys; ages 16, 13 and 9
Live: Canada
Mom's Name: Kate
Nicknames: Ersie, Eri, Houston (work nickname)
Overnight Hospital Stays:  Birth of 3 boys, tonsillectomy, sinus surgery
Pet Peeve: Poor grammar, people who eat while talking on the phone, 
Quote from a movie:  "There's no place like home"
Right or left handed: Right
Siblings:  2 younger brothers and a younger sister
Time you wake up:  6:00 - 6:30 a.m.
Underwear:  Nobody's business
Vegetables you dislike: Brussel Sprouts
What makes you run late: Having a habitually late husband
X-Rays you've had: teeth -- I honestly don't remember having xrays done
Yummy Food you make: my chili is pretty darn delicious
Zoo Animals:  I am really not a big fan of zoos.  Usually the animals look really unhappy and unhealthy

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Table Talk Tuesday

This was a fun little thing that we decided to start at our house.  You ask random questions and everyone gets a chance to answer.  So each week, if only to remind myself in the future, I'm going to post our questions for the week and what each boy's answer was:

At this time the boys are 16, 13 and 9

1.  List 3 things you like about yourself:

Andrew -- funny, musical, smart
Max -- smart, tall, funny
Ryker -- good at soccer, smart, creative

2.  If you could plan our perfect family vacation, where would we go and what would we do?

Andrew -- I would like to go to Venice, Florence and Rome and see all the historical places and amazing architecture.
Max -- I want to go to Ireland and eat potatoes
Ryker -- I want to go to Mexico and see the monkeys

3.  If you could have dinner with any world leader, who would it be?

Andrew -- Bill Clinton, because he seems like a cool party animal and we could play saxophone together
Max -- George W. Bush because he's an idiot and I would feel smart around him
Ryker -- Barack Obama because we both like fried chicken.

4.  What is your favorite word and why?

Andrew --  hippomonstrosesquippedaliophobia, which means fear of large words.  I like it because it's ironic
Max -- I don't have a favorite word
Ryker -- hashtag, because it sounds funny

5.  If you could hold the Guinness world record for anything, what would it be?

Andrew -- I would like to have the most #1 platinum albums in history
Max -- I would like to have the longest video game marathon ever
Ryker -- I would like to eat the world's biggest burger

6.  If you were stranded on a desert island for 1 month, what 2 people would you bring with you?

Andrew -- Mercedes (current girlfriend) and Chef Ramsay
Max --  Bear Grylls and a fat man so I would have someone to eat
Ryker -- Bear Grylls and Morgan Freeman because one is good at survival and one has a sexy voice


Sunday, June 9, 2013

Weekend Roundup

This weekend started off with the thought that since the weather was supposed to be crummy, maybe a movie night at the theatre was in order.  So, dad and the two older boys went and saw

 

Ryker and I opted for something a little easier for a 9-year old to follow and we decided on seeing


Everyone came away happy with their cinematic selections.....and bellies full of rich, buttery popcorn.  As we left the theatre we realized that we must have missed quite a rain storm, and the air smelled glorious.

Saturday was too nice a day to be indoors, so we decided to put the troops to work in the yard.  We needed to remove an area of dead grass in our backyard and ready it for some fresh sod.  So after doing the flyers and plying the boys with slurpees, we got to work tearing up the earth.

First, Drew had to survey the land and get a plan in place.


Then everyone got to work on tearing up the grass (the horrendous garden and nasty fence are another job for another time)

Ryker was a good little helper who wasn't afraid of getting his hands dirty


But he did have to take a break and get himself up in a tree....he is my monkey after all


Saturday night, Ryker had a sleepover with, who else, his best friend, Corbin.  They had great fun with pop and ice cream sandwiches, nerf wars, xbox, lego and even a bit of dressing up like fancy gentlemen.  Ryker was just upset that he didn't have a monocle.


This morning we had a bit of a damper on our spirits when we learned that Corbin's mom, also named Erin, had to put their dog, Ike, down.  We were all very sad for Corbin's family.  Ryker and I went over to the store to get some flowers and treats and took them to the house to offer our sympathy.  RIP Ike.  You were an awesome old hound.

This evening we are having a delicious dinner of BBQ ribs and playing some games. 

Tomorrow is back to work for another week.  Why cant' the weekends ever last a bit longer?

Sunday, June 2, 2013

Fill in the Blanks Fun

So, now that I'm sort of back in the swing of blogging, I think I'm going to try and keep up with doing it more often.  Here's a little game I saw going around the blogosphere.  Feel free to play along....

1.  The last thing I ate was -- A Crunchie bar, and it was delicious

2.  The next thing I'd like to eat is -- a delicious chocolate banana smoothie for breakfast tomorrow

3.  The best things -- are usually the little things.  Like how Ryker asks if he can cuddle with me on my bed for half an hour before his bedtime.  I sure do love that boy.

4.  Something that makes me supremely and utterly happy is -- thinking about the upcoming summer holidays and thinking about all the fun things I can do with my boys.

5.  Sports are -- a whole lot of fun to watch......if it's hockey or basketball.  Especially if you're there in person.  The adrenaline that flows and the electricity that flows through the crowd.  So much fun!

6.  I miss -- my grandma.  Especially with the July 1st holiday coming up.  It just hasn't been the same for the past 14 years without her.

7.  Right now I am -- multitasking.  I'm blogging, listening to Songza, browsing Pinterest

Saturday, June 1, 2013

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 31

WOW!  I have to say that I am really proud of myself.  I wasn't sure I'd be able to pull off blogging every day.  Now, granted I missed a couple of days here and there, but I went back and made them up, still hitting every topic.

Day 31 -- A Vivid Memory

It was a warm spring day in May.  The sun was peeking through the clouds as we pulled up to the church.  I still remember the effort it took to get out of the car and the sound of the doors as they slammed behind us.  My heels clicked on the pavement as I made my way toward the door of the building, my head tucked toward my chest.  I wasn't ready for this.

My eyes panned over the crowd of people that were already gathering and I busied myself with little Andrew, trying to not make contact with anyone, but it was too late.  Everywhere I looked were sad eyes and brave smiles.  My eyes met my cousin Dana across the room and we both smiled.  She made her way toward me and folded me into one of the longest, deepest hugs I've ever experienced.  It was comforting and heartbreaking all at once.

We made our way down the hall to the room I was trying so desperately to avoid.  I took a deep, cleansing breath and walked into the room.  There were aunts, uncles, cousins and family friends everywhere.  And at the front of the room was the lush, rich casket containing the earthly body of my grandmother.

Time stood still for a moment.  The larger than life, louder than necessary, vibrant, smiling woman that I had known for all my 22 years lay still and stoic, dressed in white.  It was difficult for me to remember that just three days earlier she had spoken on the telephone to Andrew, and my heart caught in my throat.  Why hadn't I gotten on the line and talked to her too?

The next half hour was a bittersweet trip down memory lane with family coming together to share stories and anecdotes, remembering her imparted bits of wisdom and wondering who was going to take over the duties that had so seamlessly and lovingly been handled by the family matriarch.  There were tears, there was laughter......and there was love. Then it was time to go to the chapel.

I watched as everyone began to file out of the room, and purposefully held back.  I wasn't ready to leave yet, not ready to tear myself away from her, knowing that once I left the room there was no going back.  Soon everyone had gone, leaving me alone standing at the casket.  I looked down at my grandmother, grabbed her hand and placed a kiss on her forehead.  I told her that I loved her.  And in that moment, it was just her and I.......she was there.  I knew she was.

I made my way into the chapel with my family, somewhat numbed to what was going on; willing myself to wake up, because this had to be a horrible dream.  But as I walked up to the pulpit preparing to sing for her one last time, my heart pounding in my ears, I knew that it was not a dream.

Just before the music started I looked up over the congregation.  I saw the family in the first few rows, close friends, people that knew and loved my grandmother........and I was overcome by what I saw.  There were so many people.  It felt like the entire town of 3500 people were crammed into the church that day.  Every seat was taken, there were people standing.  I was overcome with what an impact my grandmother must have had, what a significant imprint she must have left on the world to have so many people want to join with us in celebrating her life.

The strength to share my song somehow found it's way to my heart.  And in that moment, it didn't feel like she was gone.  It felt like she was standing right there behind me, singing every word with me.  I wasn't alone, and in the last chord of the song, I knew I never would be.



Thursday, May 30, 2013

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 30

May 30 -- Letting Go


Your past is what makes you the person you are today.  Don't look back, the future is right there in front of you.  Smile and laugh at the good memories.  You won't forget the sad times....but that's okay.  Learn from your mistakes.  Let go of the worries.  Love the person you have become.



Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 29

May 29 -- Five songs or pieces of music that speak to you or bring back memories.

#1 Danny Boy -- This song will forever and ever remind me of my grandma


#2  Godspeed (Sweet Dreams) -- I used to sing this song to Ryker every night before I put him to sleep.


#3  Enjoy the Silence -- This song reminds me of Jr. High and LDS Stake Dances


#4  Joyride -- This song (actually the entire album) makes me thing of my husband.  Our first year together we traveled a lot and this album seemed to be the soundtrack of most of our trips.  We probably wore out that CD we listened to it so much.


#5 A Day Without Rain -- I don't know what it is about this song, but I love it.  It never fails to relax me and put me in a good mood.



Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 28

May 28th -- Only Pictures

So this is just supposed to be a post of pictures.  I went looking through my old Photobucket account and here it a few of the gems I found.











Monday, May 27, 2013

Blog Every day in May -- Day 27

May 27 -- A letter to your readers

Dearest AWESOME readers:

I love you.  For real, you totally rock my socks off.  Thank you for reading about my life.  I know I'm not THAT important, so for you to take time out of your busy day means the world to me.

Also thank you...thank you for deciding to read my little rants and raves in this, my little corner of the blogosphere.  Thanks for coming back for more.

As much as I wake up each day and want to share with my readers, I blog for myself.  I have always been a creative person and I have always loved the English language and pouring myself onto a page.  I was always a diary or journal keeper.   This little space is my very own creative outlet -- I can writer and post whatever I like and it's very cathartic for me.  It makes me feel good and clears my head.  So thank you for reading and just letting me be me.

Most of my readers have their own blogs, and I thank you for these amazing daily reads.  I find great comfort and inspiration about reading other blogs.  I love that I can follow on your journey.

I hope that by reading my blog, I make your day a little bit brighter.  Be it because you think I'm ridiculous or because you just love to revel in the craziness that is my life, I just hope I make you smile.

Because smiling is important.  And you know what else is important???

Knowing your self worth and that life will work out for you.  It might not be on your timetable, but it will work out.

I am proof that random decisions can change your life and that things happen when they are supposed to happen.

Cheers to you my friends.  I love you all.

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 26

May 26 -- Something you read online.  Leave a link.

OK, so I don't do a lot of online "reading" per se.  I prefer my reading to be done in actual book form.  So instead I'll just share with you some of the websites I frequent.

Stumbleupon --  This website is the bomb if you literally just want to stumble upon anything and/or everything on the internet.  It can literally suck up hours of your life.

Awkward Family Photos - and - People of Walmart -- these two sites have pictures that will literally leave you laughing your butt off.....or just shaking your head and wondering what the world is coming to.

Upworthy --  This website is full of feel-good stories and uplifting things to share.  I mean really, if you have time to pass useless "chain letters" around the internet, you have time to share a few of these.

Songza -- The greatest music listening site ever.  It has a billion playlists and depending on what you give a thumbs up or thumbs down to, it will suggest playlists for you.  No matter your mood or time of day, this site has some awesome tunes.

Tend -- This is just like Pinterest, but specifically geared to moms.  So if you like mom blogs, but don't have time to read a million of them for decorating, recipes, home and family ideas.....head over to Tend.

Anyway, that's a few of the websites that I frequent when I just want to shut my brain off.  You're welcome.


Sunday, May 26, 2013

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 25

May 25 -- Something someone once told you about yourself that you'll never forget. (Good or bad)

I'm not gonna lie....this challenge has been a real -- well, challenge.  I have to dig deeper, think back and do some serious soul searching to find answers, memories and anecdotes about myself, my feelings and my life.

Don't get me wrong, it's been an incredible experience.  But with this challenge, I am stuck.  Like seriously, stuck.  There really isn't one thing I've been told good or bad that has stood out so much that I could write an entire blog post on it.

But rather, I can tell you that there is one person who when he says something, I take it all in.  I listen (even when he thinks I'm not) and what he says matters.

That person, of course, is my super awesome husband!


Over the years, he has said the following; the good, the bad and the ugly.

*I would love to spend more time with you
*I really like you
*I love you
*I want to spend the rest of my life with you
*You can do it
*I believe in you
*I'm proud of you
*You're my best friend
*I value your opinion
*You make me happy

He has also said the following:

*I think you need to stop acting like that
*I don't agree with you
*Don't talk to me like that
*You were wrong
*You can do better
*Why did you do that
*You are being silly, unfair, unreasonable
*I think you need to take a step back

This man knows how to put me in my place in the most diplomatic way.  He knows how to build me up when I am weak or struggling.  He knows how to love and adore me unconditionally.  Everything he says.....I will never forget.

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 24

May 24 -- Your three worst traits

Wait, what?!?  I don't have any bad traits.

Bwah ha ha!  I'm sure my friends and family would disagree with that.  So let me ponder on it a minute.

#1 I put the PRO in procrastinator

I am definitely a queen procrastinator....and then HOLY GUACAMOLE something has to get done.  I sometimes look back on my life and realize how much easier I could have made things on myself.  From schoolwork when I was a kid to housework as a wife and mother.  When I am at work I am always the dutiful worker bee, the one who takes initiative, the one who works her a$$ off......but I find it hard to transfer that over into my personal life.  Laundry can wait for later, the vacuuming doesn't have to be done this second, I"ll scrub the floor after I do....well, something else.  I mean, even when it comes to this blog.  Today I'm trying to make up three days worth of posts, because I just didn't do it when it was supposed to be done.  I am definitely not your Type A personality.

#2  I tend to put myself down.....a lot


I don't know why it is, but I have never had a cup overflowing with self-esteem.  I have never tended to hold myself in high regard.  I was a sub par student that didn't have many friends, I lost in the school elections, I didn't make the cheer leading team.  Growing up with a tall, beautiful, athletic sister, it was difficult for me to feel attractive.  It made no difference to me that I had a beautiful singing voice that people have always raved about.  Or that I am a brilliant writer who really should have a book published by now.  I feel inferior and always have.  Even as a wife and mother I don't feel like I'm cutting it and will often tell myself so.  My husband deserves a thinner, prettier wife who keeps a nicer house.  Other people look at my children and comment on what a great job I've done raising them, how they are such polite, helpful, brilliant boys.  But in my mind there are sooooo many things I could be doing better.  I'm not smart enough, talented enough, good enough.  I don't do enough.  I honestly can't tell you why I've always felt this way.....but there it is.

#3 I Almost Always put Myself Last


I think a lot of moms are guilty of this.  We are so concerned with the running of the family, the raising of the kids.....everyone's needs, everyone's happiness, wants, wishes, cares and dreams come before our own.  And to a degree this is how it should be.  We brought these little people into the world, and until they can adequately care for themselves, it is our job to do it.  But that doesn't mean you should feel guilty about taking time for yourself or spending a little money on yourself.  I really need to remember this sometimes.  I mean, I haven't had a hair cut in almost a year because I think I could and should spend that money on something my kids want or need.  But sometimes what they really need is a happy, healthy mom who knows how to take care of her own needs.

Friday, May 24, 2013

Blog Every Day in May -- Day 23

May 23 -- Things you've learned that school doesn't teach you


Manners Matter

As far as I am concerned, please and thank you are still two of the most important phrases out there.  It's sad that so often people forget them.  As my grandma always used to say, "Good Manners and a clean set of clothes will take you a long way".  Knowledge of etiquette and how to act in certain social situations can be a saving grace.  I realize that a lot of the "stuffy" old manners of yesteryear are not things that are going to come back into fashion, but being polite and kind to others is something that will never go out of style.


Sometimes the Bad Guys Win

This is a truth that sucks, but it's a truth nonetheless.  In school (and usually in the movies) you are taught that truth and justice will always prevail, but sometimes they don't.  Sometimes the bad guys get off because of some legal loophole or technicality.  Sometimes the darkness triumphs over the light.  Often the big CEO's and presidents of companies have reached their status by being dishonest and cheating.....and they are never called out on it.  Cheaters often prosper.  But I take solace in the knowledge that MOST of the time the good guys win.

Here's a couple other quick ones;

-  It's okay to outgrow friendships that aren't healthy for you

- Grandparents are a wonderful blessing

- Each stage of life is vital and important to God's plan for us.  Don't wish one stage away or be in too big a hurry to get to the next one

-  Mom (and dad) are still usually always right

Tis The Season For My Favorite Christmas Albums

Martina McBride – White Christmas Let it Snow | Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas | Silver Bells | Hark! The Herald Angels ...