It's What You Didn't Become That Hurts

It’s not what you are, it’s what you didn’t become that hurts.
-Oscar Levant


What I Didn’t Become

*A famous writer, with a shelf full of humorous best-selling books to my credit

*Stunningly beautiful and glamorous

*An Oscar-winning screenwriter and film director, interviewed by James Lipton on Inside the Actors’ Studio

*Celine Dion

*Dorothy Parker

*Tall

*An intrepid news reporter

*A college history professor, recognized by my wardrobe of corduroy blazers and loafers, and beloved by colleagues and students alike

*Popular

*A triathlete

*A rich man’s trophy wife, with nothing more to do all day than shop, lunch with friends, and contemplate plastic surgery

*A superhero

*The realization of all of my parents’ hopes and dreams

*The perfect wife and mother


What I Did Become

*An aspiring writer, with a blog that I either love or hate, depending on the day, and a list of lame book ideas that’ll probably never see the light of day

*An average-looking 30-something, with a wardrobe provided by Walmart and sales racks at the local mall

*A movie fan with not a lot of time to watch movies, who keeps a running list of answers to Le Questionnaire by “Bear-naaaard Pee-VO!” (said in obnoxious fake French accent)

*An enthusiastic car, shower, house, yard and karaoke singer

*A girl who is supposed to wear glasses

*Compassionate

*Someone who can’t watch hard hitting TV news shows because it freaks me out

*Fiercely protective of my small circle of close friends and family

*Proud of myself for starting to take the stairs

*Happily married to a silly, handsome man who makes me laugh and infuriates me and is a remarkable father and husband, a man I wouldn’t trade for all the multi-billionaires in the world

*A terrible multi-tasker with a lazy streak and a severe case of Mom-nesia

*Always hopeful that better things are just around the corner

*A not-so-perfect wife and mom, who makes a lot of mistakes but tries to learn from them, and who has more love in her heart for the special people in her life than she ever thought possible.


You know what else I’ve become? Genuinely grateful for every good thing I have in my life. And that includes a lot of things – parents who love and support me, a roof over my head, kids who keep me on my toes, the ability to find humor (even in a terrible situation), every person who reads this blog (even the ones who think I suck), my husband, and my beautiful, happy sons.

Overall, I’d say I’m not doing so bad.